Sunday, February 28, 2010 by Dana.

The General Manager where I work gave me these nice Clubhouse tickets for Championship Sunday at the Waste Management Phoenix Open with a Valet Parking pass.  Sweet, right?  I don’t golf and never really attended a golf event to watch.  I have usually gone to take advantage of some vendor’s free stuff.  Mostly, we (my wife and I) really didn’t know what to expect about attending and being in the Clubhouse. I’d thought it would be cool. I was excited about attending and getting to watch from the Clubhouse hanging out with people with large disposable incomes.

The Clubhouse did have a great brunch buffet (free), all the drinks were complimentary (with well liquor), and the view of the 18^th green was nice (if we stood up to watch over everyone else standing up).  Other than that…  Nothing!  It turns out that only non-Golf fans can have fun by drinking too much or by being with the nutty crowd on the famous 16^th hole.  You could hear some loud cheers and boos from the 16^th hole in the distance, and when Team USA tied the hockey game against Canada with time running out, there was a loud roar from the all the sky boxes with TV’s.  So if everyone is watching TV in the sky boxes, it can’t rank high on the excitement meter to watch golf live.

We did walk down to the 16^th hole to check on the fun, but we didn’t feel like walking through mud to get to the bleachers, so we walked back to the Clubhouse for a final drink before leaving for the day. Basically, we spent the afternoon on a chilly patio drinking weak Bloody Mary’s, trying to avoid the urge to eat out of boredom.  It goes without saying that I would never waste money on paying to attend such an event, and if I get offered free tickets again, I’ll see sell them or try to trade them for a something more enjoyable, which could be almost anything including a back hair waxing.

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Monday, February 22, 2010 by Dana.

A risqué web site offered the City of Phoenix $10 million to rename the airport for 5 years. This is analogous to businesses putting their lame names on beloved stadiums.  The question is… where does it stop?  Will we see a company like this drop $10 Million to pay people to wrap their cars to advertise their website?  Will troubled businesses add this company’s name in front of their automotive or airplane logos?  Will they convince a nearly bankrupt city, county, or state to rename train stations, parks, zoos, museums or other public facilities?

Sooner or later, it will happen… only in Disturbia!

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Wednesday, February 17, 2010 by Dana.

A picture is worth a thousand words… so I made this to describe what my dogs are like in the back yard.

By drk0524 | View this Toon at ToonDoo | Create your own Toon

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Sunday, February 14, 2010 by Dana.

It may sound like a silly question, but let’s pretend that it isn’t for a moment and list reasons your dog deserves something on Valentine’s Day.

Your dog:

1. Loves you unconditionally

2. Is always happy to see you

3. Will spoon with you without wanting sex

4. Will kiss you no matter where your mouth has been or how bad your breath is

5. Doesn’t care if you have if you have gained a few pounds or if you are having a bad hair day

6. Make great snuggle blankets

7. Can learn new tricks

8. Will not criticize you or bring up the fact that you forget to clean, cook, or do some other semi-important task

9. Is always willing to spend time with you

10. Will eat anything you make

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Friday, February 12, 2010 by Dana.

How would you feel if your neighbor did this?

1. Don’t care
2. Angry and would let them know it
3. Report them to the HOA
4. Upset but pretend you don’t notice
5. Trip your shrubs like a breasts or a vagina
6. Excited about the traffic increase at your lemonade stand
7. Make a mental note to invite them to more pool parties

Note: You may pick more than 1 of the above.

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Wednesday, February 10, 2010 by Dana.

During a business dinner tonight, a co-worker asked how my coaching activities were going.  I was telling him that my middle child was now on 2 teams, having made his 7^th grade team.  I coach his club team, and I was talking about how so many of the boys on our club team had made their school teams.  This was rewarding for me because the club team had been put together specifically to help get the boys ready for their school team tryouts.  My wife then chimed in with “You’ve coached all the boys that  made the school team, right?”.

I paused to think, and then I realized… yes, almost.  In fact, I have coached 12 of the 14 boys, and the other 2 I have coached against.  I also have coached for or against nearly all the 8^th grade boys and the 7^th and 8^th grade teams at neighboring schools.  It gives me a great sense of accomplishment to have been able to see these boys grow and develop in baseball and in life.  Youth baseball coaches don’t get paid, volunteer large amounts of time, and spend money out of their own pockets for gear… and we don’t ask for anything in return. We do it because we want to, and we do it because we like seeing the boys grow and improve because of our contribution.

If you are a youth sports coach, I tip my hat and extend my thanks to you for all that you do.

If you are a parent, let your coach know that he/she is appreciated. It means a lot to us.

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Sunday, February 7, 2010 by Dana.

The day of the big game… As usual, we have several options for watching it, but we choose to stay home.  Why?  A variety of reasons, but having an awesome wide-screen HDTV and surround sound system is NOT one of them.

Instead of discussing why we don’t go elsewhere, let me explain the advantages of staying home (not necessarily in order).

1. The kids are welcome
2. Inexpensive, higher quality food
3. No mark-up on the beer & liquor
4. No line for a clean bathroom
5. No drinking & driving risks
6. The dogs get to be there
7. Comfy couch
8. No tipping required
9. Easier to tweet during the game
10. Unlikely to get drinks spilled on us
11. No waiting for overburdened wait staff (the cooler is next to the couch).
12. No drama with other party guests
13. Kids can go to their own room if they a bored.
14. Screaming loud at the TV will not annoy any strangers
15. Nobody will see how big of a wuss I am when I eat seriously spicy guacamole
16. Added excitement of avoiding a dog attack when you get carried away with your high-fives
17. The ability to switch to an HBO movie if the game gets one-sided
18. We can watch the game wearing whatever we want, which means wife doesn’t have to keep re-applying lip gloss.
19. Pre-game co-ed showers (in the privacy of the master bathroom of course).
20. Half-time cul-de-sac football game!

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